Relationships are not always the same at all times. Instead, they can act as a power struggle, with partners seeking to satisfy all their needs by controlling each other's behavior. An example of this dynamic is a man who tries to make excessive and unrealistic demands on his wife or girlfriend. If you realize that this is exactly the situation that has arisen in your relationship, then you can correct it by reevaluating your own expectations, setting boundaries in the demands that you can fulfill, and still hope for equality in your marriage.
Video: Let's get married 06/30/2016 SHOCK! "DO NOT FART!" VERY DEMANDING DIRECTOR! Latest Issue June 30
First, you should ask your husband to talk about what he expects from your marriage. Unrealistic demands can be a sign of a lack of realism in many different aspects of life.
Your husband may be unrealistic about his career, his children, his physical or sexual prowess, and his degree of freedom; he must explore his interests thoroughly on his own. At the same time, you may also be unaware of the real expectations and, paradoxically, the pursuit and indulgence of your husband.
Video: Mark Henry vs. Rusev: Raw, Aug. 10, 2015
If your husband tells you that he has sexual needs and you are not fulfilling them, then you need to listen to him and find ways to improve your sex life.
Video: LET'S GET MARRIED 2016 SECOND WIFE FOR A GORGEOUS MAN! Latest issue 2016
Very often quarrels arise due to the fact that professional activity both have the same, and this causes additional demands - and more often from men, since they need to be dominant. Therefore, it is better that you and your companion are of different professions, because misunderstandings and conflicts will not arise on this basis. And if your companion is simply demanding of himself and those around him, then you need to come to terms with this and appreciate his individuality.
Attention, TODAY only!
Exactingness is a useful quality in itself, sometimes even very necessary. However, it is known that everything can be taken to the point of absurdity, including demandingness. If you are a confirmed bachelor, although there is a long string of dates behind you, and the light at the end of the tunnel has not dawned, this article is for you...
1. You left him because he snored.
Or because he finished your piece of cake after you. Or because he refused to relieve himself while sitting. Or because he picked his nose in front of you. Etc.... All this, of course, is very regrettable, but is not a sufficient reason to break off the relationship. Just think about what some of the things you do look like from the outside...
2. You can describe your ideal man for two hours straight.
Handsome, smart, rich, noble, considerate, loving, kind, generous, talented, optimistic, strong, confident... Anything else? A couple more soul-caressing epithets? If so, then you are firmly mired in the swamp of your arch-demandingness, and something urgently needs to be done about it! Otherwise, you will not see marriage as your ears. Lower the bar and choose the best possible one.
3. You're always late for dates, but get offended when your crush isn't there yet.
If you cultivate these double standards, you are too demanding of your partner and too lenient with yourself. When allowing yourself something, be prepared for the fact that your young man will extend the corresponding freedom to himself.
4. You ignore men who are too fast
You gave your mobile number interesting guy, but in the end they rejected him, because... he called you only two hours after the first meeting. Hmmm... Are you afraid that he is a maniac? Maniacs do not act so clearly. In any case, those who meet on the street under the clear sun at a flower stall. Or maybe easy prey is not interesting to you? But you haven't caught anything yet: perhaps the first date will be the last; perhaps yours new fan in fact, very soon he will disappear from your life forever, even if he invites you to romantic dinner at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Selyavi! So don’t turn your nose up and seize the moment! It is possible that fate itself is coming into your hands. So that it doesn’t turn out like in that joke: - ...And who sent you a boat, a helicopter?
5. You refuse a date because... "he looks bad"
How many men were literally picked up in the dust, washed, combed and dressed properly! Not much less was subsequently “sealed” with a registry office mark in the passport. Know that behind the neat elegance of men are often caring female hands, so a scruffy appearance can be regarded as a good sign. And why did you decide that your gift of fate would certainly be presented to you on a silver platter? Sometimes you need to work hard on your own happiness! The reward for this may be, if not a prince on a white horse, then at least a sane and decent person on a bicycle. Or on a Mercedes - that’s how you will try together. In general, if happiness passes you by, create it for yourself!
6. You always refuse
If you have never been refused, but you always refuse, this is a sure sign that you are too picky. So you can face old age alone! Don't avoid relationships - avoid idealizing them.
7. You've turned down more dates than you've had dates.
Each new date is not only a chance to find a life partner, but also an opportunity to expand your knowledge about people, training your communication skills and presentation skills. Try not to refuse meetings, especially if you have free time for them. At a minimum, you will gain new communication experience that you can apply in future relationships with the opposite sex. Finally, an archer who doesn't shoot never hits his target.
8. You don't believe in continuing the relationship even before the first date.
Perfectionism mixed with pessimism is an explosive mixture from an old maid. Don’t put a dam right away - let the river of relationships flow the way it wants, because its flow is natural. Life itself will put everything in its place and show which dates are worth continuing and which ones are not.
9. Your favorite phrase is “He’s too…”
...Fat, thin, tall, short... - this list in terms of the number of words is inferior only to the list of paragraph 2 of this opus. Don’t rush into judgment and remember that a person with average parameters rarely turns out to be interesting. In addition, it is not height or weight that determine a person’s true suitability for living together.
10. You expect him to be the first to confess his love or propose.
It’s no secret: historically and traditionally, it has been the man who takes these steps. However, in essence, if you look at it, this is nothing more than a convention. Isn't it true love Are there gender differences and limitations? Why don’t I, a woman, have the right to be the first to declare my feelings and the seriousness of my intentions? If I do this, and my partner then refuses to have a relationship with me, it means that he needed me; and if he reaches out to me even more, then isn’t that what happiness is?
Most women expect that in marriage a man will become their true life partner, will understand and support them, and as a result family life will turn into a happy pastime. But it often happens that the chosen man turns into an egoist who “can only demand what.” This can lead to harmful consequences, including rupture. What to do if your husband is selfish, demanding and arrogant?
The first step, however, is to understand the reasons for such changes. After all, for sure, the husband did not suddenly turn into an egoist and began to show “selfishness and demandingness” - these are unpleasant qualities for any woman. Therefore, the answer to the question about changes in relationships should be found and found out - why the husband is an egoist, and not just say that “he’s picking on me for the wrong reason” and “he’s just getting annoyed with me.” Nothing just happens, there must be a reason for everything. This also applies to the behavior of men. Of course, sometimes you can just get caught in a “hot” hand.
A man is not a robot, he can have troubles at work, quarrels with friends, and just a bad mood. In this case, your inappropriate “cooing” may well result in rudeness on his part. Well, we are all human, and, for sure, there have been situations in your life when your husband also fell under your “hot hand”.
Also, such problems can arise among spouses working in the same company. It happens that a man may come to the conclusion that it is his wife’s incompetent business management that leads to a decrease in profits or earnings. In this case, you should listen to his criticism. It may well turn out that it is not completely groundless, and by devoting more time to work rather than calling friends or social networks, you will actually bring more benefit to the company, and the result will be harmony in your relationship with your loved one, plus an increase in your well-being.
This reason for “a man turning into a demanding egoist” should rather be considered as his concern for you and your professional level. The truth may turn out that he decided to gain the favor of another woman and humiliate you. But even in this case, everything is in your own hands. After all, you can appear before him in a new role - the role of a highly qualified specialist, which will leave your competitor far behind.
Male aggression in everyday life is often a reaction to something you didn’t do. Maybe he is not happy that when he returns late after work, tired, he does not find the promised dinner, and plus the apartment is a mess. And as a result, “he is an egoist.” Although in this case you are more likely to be an egoist. After all, when planning to become his wife, you knew that housework would largely become your responsibility. And now by neglecting this, you force the man to demand. Therefore, if a man is a breadwinner, then by bringing home money, he fully deserves coziness, comfort and delicious food prepared by you.
In those cases when there are objective reasons, for example, you were stuck in a traffic jam, or were not feeling well, then talking with your loved one will help smooth out all these everyday problems. Surely he will understand and tolerate. But such reasons should not be abused, otherwise next time, instead of understanding on his part, you may get distrust, and this may turn out to be even worse than demandingness. Well, if giving the reasons didn’t help, then explain that you are his wife, not a servant, and you don’t deserve his boorish attitude.
A quarrel or scandal that has occurred may push you to take revenge, but this is not best method problem solving. Escalating the conflict is not the way to restore relationships. The first step towards restoring the relationship will most likely be correcting all the shortcomings that your husband pointed out to you. And after that, he may well stop “selfishly nagging” you. If it doesn’t help, then it means the reason is somewhere deeper. In such cases, talking should help. We people are not dumb creatures; we are given speech as an opportunity to resolve conflicts.
And the sooner you take the path of dialogue with your loved one, find out all the reasons for his changed attitude towards you, the better the results will be, the bigger problems you can avoid in the future. But if this does not help, the husband becomes more and more petty, more and more demanding, really puts a strong emphasis on any little things, turning them into a reason for a quarrel or in order to humiliate you, then such an attitude should not be tolerated. In this case, an ultimatum would be appropriate - if this does not stop, then you will leave him. You have the right to be happy, and not waste time on his selfishness, nagging and humiliation.
Today, marriages of those spouses whose areas of activity do not overlap are more stable. In this way, it is possible to avoid transferring professional conflicts into the home environment. Family relationships should be built on mutual understanding, spouses should value each other. Only then is harmony achieved, and happiness settles in the house for a long time.
If you have your own recipe for what to do if your husband is a tyrant and selfish, very demanding and arrogant, please speak up!
