There is something more important in parental care than simply caring for the baby - communication is as necessary for the child as food! If the mother or another adult who is constantly caring for the baby and with whom emotional contact is possible is available, everything will be fine with the baby. At the same time, contact should not be “ideal” at all, that is, take up one hundred percent of the baby’s waking time - it should simply be “good enough.”

Nursing a child in the first years of his life until he begins to say “I” about himself provides a basic, unconditional level of connection with his parents. It turns out that babies who stay in constant contact with their mothers during the first year of life are more able to cope with separation from them as they get older.

At first, the child feels inextricably linked with his mother, but gradually moving away from her, he becomes more independent and begins to study the world around us. Contact with the mother gives confidence and helps the baby to rely on his own strength: a child who maintains contact with his mother gets used to trusting, and the feeling of trust is conducive to the development of independence.

That is why at this age it is extremely undesirable for the mother to go to work - it is possible only in extreme circumstances. If the mother sees him little in the first two years of the baby’s life, the connection will either be weakened or, conversely, overly anxious, neurotic, tinged with guilt and lacking true sensitivity. It is important that the adult has both time and attention for the child!

Lifelong dialogue

If the connection between the personality of the parent and the child is established, a dialogue begins between them that lasts a lifetime. This conversation begins with the first children's questions, with the famous “Why?” and “What is this?” The child grows, his questions become more serious: “Where did I come from?”, “Where was I when I was not there?”, “Why can’t you see God?” Largely based on the answers to these questions, the child builds his personality and his worldview.

Intense dialogue between children and parents is a feature of the current time. Just about one hundred and fifty years ago, in a traditional family, the connection between children and parents was perceived quite differently, and was more likely manifested in obedience and honoring parents.

Today, in big cities, people live in a fragmented world, where even family ties are being destroyed, not to mention ordinary human ones, which are getting worse and worse. The pace of life is accelerating, in the pursuit of wealth, personal or career growth, people tend to forget about the simplest things - rest, communication, nature, prayer. We run and feel more and more acutely the mechanical nature of our own lives. And even spending quite a lot of time with the child, in fact, we do not really communicate with him, but only “operate as an object”: we transport him from class to class, implement this or that program, health improvement or development!

What a family is like is the quality of communication

The quality of communication, in other words, the “psychological distance” between parents and child can be very different: families differ from each other no less than planets solar system. What is absolutely normal and natural for one family may seem wild and absurd for another. Differences affect all parties family life , but they are especially noticeable in relation to the quality of communication with the child.

In many modern families the child takes center stage. All the semantic lines of the family’s life converge to him. They expect something from the child, they are very worried about him, they hope for his success. The child is not perceived as “a boy/girl in itself,” but as “the son of his mother,” “the granddaughter of his grandmother,” “the great-grandson of a brilliant academician,” “the daughter of a talented ballerina.” And often this community of adults, which includes not only father and mother, but grandparents, and sometimes uncles and aunts, does not feel the signals that the child sends. This makes the child want to run away, to “go into denial.” “It’s hard for me to be a Child with a capital C! I’m stifled by your expectations! I just want to play!” - a child can say with his behavior.

In this situation, the child-parent connection will certainly be weakened, since the child’s parents do not hear - they understand only their own dream about the child, their plan for him, and not his real experiences.

And the most difficult version of such families is when the child is not just in the center of attention, but on the throne. He feels his dominance and even with preschool age knows well that only his wishes are heard in the family. Parents instill in the child a kind of deafness to everything except his own desires. And in such a situation of real connection, good contact Not with the baby: it is the child who sets the rules of the game, but he himself is not able to cope with them. As a result, an incompetent and short-sighted little tyrant grows up.

There are families with incredibly close relationships, not only between young children and their parents, but also between generations. In such families, sitting at the table alone is unthinkable, and traveling somewhere on your own is considered a crime.

But there are families where emotional closeness and close connection - not only between children and parents, but between everyone and everyone - is considered something excessive, almost indecent. Often, dad works from home, mom is at home, and the child is also home most of the time. It seems that all family members are nearby... but not together, everyone is focused on their own screen: dad - at the computer, mom - at the TV, child - at the game console... A kind of refrigerator family, in which the manifestation of emotions can be considered lack of culture and violation of boundaries. A child growing up in such an atmosphere will have specific ideas about what a connection with parents is.

In conflict families, communication between children and parents can also be difficult. In such families, friendships are always made “against someone,” and this approach can leave an imprint on the child’s personal style. If we are now friends with dad, then we are definitely against mom. Or if we are close with my mother, then it’s against it. A child may well form a stereotype: love and connection are always war and hostility. He will begin to divide the world into friends and foes, into friends and enemies.

To adolescence the child does not critically evaluate parents and the quality of communication with them. He takes his family for granted, he simply belongs to it. This is natural for him, like breathing, while it is the quality of the connection with his parents that influences how the child will perceive human relationships in general.

When communication with a child is disrupted

Let's try to identify the most typical life situations in which a break, loss or temporary disruption of communication with our child can occur, and offer ideas for each of these cases.

  1. We may not keep up with the speed of the child’s development, the changes happening to him, and the child may feel that no one in the family loves him... This happens at the time of serious life changes: when a new baby is born, the mother goes to work, the family moves. That is, during periods of major life gains, losses, global changes, a child may think that what is happening and the whole world is against him, may close in - there will be a feeling of loss of connection.
  2. The child may be experiencing some difficult circumstance, trauma, something that happened to him when we were not around. And we, not knowing what’s wrong with him, can feel that the connection has been lost. Or, growing up, he closes the “inner doors” and fences himself off from us. This is called “adolescence” and is experienced quite difficult by most parents.
    If this is your case, remember that it is during adolescence that the “renegotiation of the agreement” about the connection between children and parents occurs. And if a teenage crisis seriously quarrels between you, then connections may not be restored, and you and your adult children will be spiritual strangers to each other. You can put up with a lot from a teenager in order to maintain a connection. But this patience should not be patience from a position of weakness, when parents tolerate this or that behavior simply because they cannot do anything. It is important to be patient and take active action.
  3. The connection can also be lost on the part of the adult. Sometimes we have no time for children. Something is changing in our own lives. We go into work or sadness, build new relationships or end old ones: we have a serious adult life with its own age-related crises. Children feel this acutely, and if this period drags on, it can lead to a loss of connection.

Restoring contact

There is no point in putting off “repairing the line of communication”, because a child who has been in a state of interrupted contact with his parents for a long time can accustom himself to isolation: he perceives the lack of communication as dislike.

Do you feel a weakening connection with your child? Here are steps that may help you:

  • Free up time, preferably a specific evening a week, by warning your child about this in advance. Agree that this will be your personal time together, and this time should be at least 2-3 hours, minus travel time. Figure out how best to spend this time - it all depends on the lifestyle and preferences of the family;
  • Explain to your child that you were going through difficult times. Children are sensitive creatures, they will understand you if you choose the right words;
  • urgently take a set of measures to restore contact with the child: for example, you can arrange a symbolic holiday to end difficult times. It could be a beautiful home-cooked dinner, or a sit-down in a quiet cafe, or a memorable walk. Stop it and go back to what is normal for you. When some time has passed and the relationship has been restored, talk with your child about his experiences and fears, about the thoughts that have entered his head.

If the child is still small and discussion and interaction at this level with him is not possible, you will have to do this all on your own and make a promise to yourself. But even three or four year old children are able to understand correctly chosen words. After all, communication with parents is so important for them.

How to determine the quality of communication with a child? Try to answer the following questions honestly:

  • Do you know what your child dreams of? What does he want as a gift for New Year or birthday?
  • What is your child afraid of? What are you thinking about? Which of the books he read impressed him the most?
  • Do you know what a child dreams about?
  • What is going on in his social life and immediate environment?
  • Who are his friends and enemies? Why did you quarrel with your best friend/girlfriend?
  • What does the child think about his abilities and appearance?
  • And finally, what would you like your relationship with your child to be like? Would you like your child to behave like you?

Discussion

The information is useful and, so to speak, comprehensive. I liked the article! You should definitely give it to your friend to read! She really has problems understanding her child in the family!

Comment on the article "Parents and children: how to improve relationships with a baby and a teenager"

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Relationships cannot develop on their own, like the educational pyramid toy that perhaps every adult had in childhood. To build a pyramid of rings, you need to string them in a certain sequence - from the largest to the smallest.

Same with relationships. As a rule, you need to work on them. Most moms and dads will agree with this statement.

Psychologist and teacher Tatyana Korostyshevskaya suggests presenting the relationship between a child and an adult as a special psychological pyramid, each ring of which symbolizes a certain aspect in the relationship between a parent and his child.

The core of this pyramid will be the process of interaction between a child and an adult in any form. Cooperative play, or modeling, preparation of school homework, cleaning the apartment, a regular walk - this can be absolutely any action performed with the child together.

In order to build a pyramid, you need to string rings onto the rod, from largest to smallest. Only then will we get the “pyramid effect”.

Let's figure out what exactly and how you need to do so that the central axis of your interaction with your child turns into a full-fledged pyramid.

In Tatyana Korostyshevskaya’s view, the rings of the pyramid look like this: from largest to smallest:

  1. Self awareness
  2. Awareness of your own feelings
  3. Child understanding
  4. Understanding a child's feelings
  5. Shared accommodation emotions
  6. Satisfaction from communication

Let's look at each “ring” separately.

1. Self-awareness

The basis of the pyramid, or the basis for establishing relationships, is understanding your own “I”. Know your role. Understand that you are not only a parent, you are a person, and also that there is an “inner child” living inside you.

To meet your “I-child”, it’s enough to remember your own. What made you happy and what disappointed you when you were a child? What were you interested in doing and what made you bored? What fears did you have?

Self-awareness is the basis on which good relationships with a child are built.

In order to come face to face with your child self, remember all the attitudes in the relationship between parents and children that were and are in your family. What did your parents teach you? What attitudes are you now trying to pass on to your children?

Realize your personality. Think about it:

  • What is your worldview?
  • What is your relationship with people, with the world around you?
  • what goals do you set for yourself?
  • What is stopping you from achieving these goals?
  • What inspires you? Where do you get your strength?
  • what would you like to do for others?

Understanding your own “I” is of great importance, because all these aspects directly affect the process of communication between us and the child, and form a certain direction of your actions.

2. Awareness of your own feelings

Awareness of your own feelings will not only help you better understand yourself and analyze your attitude towards your own child, but will also teach you to control these feelings, experience them, and cope with them. And this applies not only to you, but also to the child. If you are in any life situation are able to admit to themselves their feelings, the child, looking at you, will learn to do the same.

If you think that you are aware of your feelings and know how to control them, consider that the second ring of the pyramid has been successfully threaded onto the rod.

3. Understanding the child

By this “ring” we mean everything that is connected with social and age characteristics, his needs, desires, interests, abilities. Ask yourself questions and try to find answers to them:

  • What can your child do?
  • What can’t he do, and for what reason?
  • How does he do what he can?
  • What does he do easily and what is difficult?
  • How does he react to success and failure?
  • What does he love and what does he hate?

If you were able to answer all the questions, then this ring is on the axis, and we can move on.

4. Understanding the child's feelings

Understanding your child’s feelings is an important condition for establishing relationships with him. After all, you can control his activities and try to direct them in the right direction only by fully understanding how your child feels at one time or another.

There are no perfect people, and most likely you are not perfect either.

In order to string the fourth ring onto the pyramid, teach your child to express them, live them to the fullest and direct their energy in the necessary direction in order to achieve their goals without causing harm to themselves.

Putting the fifth ring on the core of the pyramid of relationships is very easy and at the same time difficult. Parents need to accept their child for who he is, along with all his strengths and - what is more difficult - his shortcomings. Always remember that there are no perfect people, and you most likely cannot be called perfect either.

6. Sharing emotions

The sixth ring is one of the most important. To cope with it, realize that emotions are always at the core of all our activities. It is under their influence that we perform certain actions. But the most important thing is the opportunity to share our emotions with a loved one, because only when there is someone nearby who can understand us, listen, sincerely rejoice for our happiness or, conversely, sympathize, can we cope with absolutely any situation.

Don’t be indifferent to your child - and then he will learn empathy

Live with your child all his emotions, share his joys and experiences, and then he will not only learn to cope with all his feelings, but also realize how important it is, how important sensitivity and understanding between loved ones is, what security the feeling of that you are not alone and you have someone with whom to share all the happy and sad moments of life. He will remember this invaluable experience forever.

7. Satisfaction from communication

The topmost ring of the pyramid is what we were striving for when gradually creating it, the meaning of the idea itself, the result that we wanted to get. We only have motivation when we see what we are striving for. The brain remembers moments that bring us pleasure, and when a similar stimulus appears, it reacts positively. Therefore, if you communicate with your child openly and joyfully, trying to get pleasure from this communication, your relationship will bring real happiness to both you and your children. And this is of utmost importance for the formation of a healthy personality in your children.

Victoria Kotlyarova

Let your child trust you

One person learns to trust another based on previous experiences. If a teenager shows that he is able to behave reasonably, take care of himself, follow rules and contribute to the overall family affairs, he can count on the trust of his parents. If parents want to gain the teenager's trust, they must support him all the time.

Stay in touch

It is very important that parents and teenagers have the opportunity to spend time together. It can be difficult for parents to maintain close contact with a teenager who is programmed to withdraw from them. It is important to be close and make open contact. Discussing good things is as useful as dealing with conflicts. Joint leisure means talking about nothing during the trip to school.

Show interest

By asking questions and showing interest in your teen, you can help improve their self-esteem. Let your child have all your attention when he is with you.

The teenager should know that he can always count on your support if problems arise. Openness, a non-judgmental approach, and a willingness to listen are very important. If you're busy and can't get distracted, schedule a time to talk.

Apologize if you make a mistake

Everyone makes mistakes, but what matters is how a person corrects them. Sincere apologies - best way begin to restore relationships after loss of trust.

Accept their independence

All teenagers strive to become more independent. The desire to break boundaries, the feeling that your development is being held back, is not so strong if you believe that you are responsible for your life and can make decisions. Naturally, this prospect worries many parents, but it is important to let the teenager go and rejoice in his successes. From time to time, your child will disappoint you, and in such cases it is important to talk through this, together making conclusions for the future. Then everyone will have realistic expectations.

Give children personal space

Everyone needs personal space. It is extremely important for a teenager to have the right to privacy: install a lock on the door of the room, count on personal time every day. Clearly defined, agreed upon and approved boundaries will help to avoid conflicts. Some parents, worried about the teenager’s condition, invade his privacy (for example, reading SMS on his phone). Such actions destroy trust and relationships in general. The mess in a teenager's room sometimes really irritates parents, but this is his personal space, which is important to respect.

Don't criticize

I urge all parents to be alert to the insidious habit of criticizing and responding with sarcasm and disdain. Watch your behavior so as not to accidentally laugh at your children. Give them leeway as they try to learn new skills, even if it means they make a few mistakes. Try not to label or give unflattering characteristics.

Some children may be quite thick-skinned, but they are still not made of cast iron. Children form an opinion about their personality from the words of their parents and, as a rule, believe what they say. If parents humiliate their children with jokes, nagging, and excessive interference, the children stop trusting them. Without trust, there is no intimacy, which means that children challenge advice and joint problem solving becomes impossible.

Show compassion

When parents empathize with their children and help them cope with negative feelings such as anger, sadness and fear, they build mutual trust and affection. Compliance, obedience and responsibility come from the love and connection children feel with their families.

When you open your heart and feel what your child does, you experience empathy, which is the foundation of emotional parenting. If you can share the emotion with your child, despite the difficult or uncomfortable feelings, then you will be able to take the next step - use the emotional moment to establish trust and offer your leadership participation.

Ask the right questions

It is advisable to avoid questions to which you already know the answer. Thus, the questions “What time did you come home last night?” or “Who broke the lamp?” set a tone of mistrust and provoke the child to lie. It’s best to start the conversation with a direct observation, for example: “You broke the lamp and I’m very upset” or “Yesterday you came back after 1 am, I think that’s unacceptable.”

Be honest

Most children seem to have a sixth sense when their parents, especially fathers, tell them the truth. Therefore, emotional education must be something more than the mechanical utterance of phrases: “I understand” or “That would drive me crazy too.” The right words will not bring you closer to your child if they do not come from the heart. Moreover, cheating can cause a loss of trust and drive a wedge in your relationship. So before you say anything, make sure you really understand your child. If you're not sure, just say what you see and hear. Ask your child a few questions, try to keep the line of communication open, and never be false.

Give children a sense of security in the family

When a child feels seen and fully accepted by those around him, it is easy for him to feel loved and protected. Surely you have seen how kids on the playground run off to see something new, but turn around to check if the adults have left, and at the same time believe that they have not left. It is this feeling of security - in psychology it is called secure attachment - that underlies the ability of any child to boldly step forward into an unknown world. Thanks to a secure attachment, the child’s emotional life will be more stable until adolescence, and this will also affect relationships in adulthood.

Hug children

Touch itself is healing. Research shows that children who are hugged and cuddled grow up healthier and calmer than those who are deprived of affectionate touch. Make sure your day is filled with hugs.

Question to a psychologist

Good afternoon My name is Maria, I have two children in my family, one is 3.5 years old, the other is 5 years old, I have always had relationship problems with my eldest daughter, she absolutely does not listen, does not hear and does not want to hear my requests, reacts very aggressively to refusal, screams, and gets mad. I tried, calmly and in a raised tone, and on the butt, but when it is on the butt, and this happens in extreme measures, it causes her aggression, sticks out her tongue, spits, very often, since the difference between the daughters is small, they are constantly in the game, they just they ignore me, for example, put on sandals, or call me to eat, or any requests, the eldest daughter is not very affectionate, for me, she doesn’t need anyone at all, as on her own, she doesn’t want to communicate, even just to say hello to her grandmother on Skype, turns away or runs away, is self-willed, I say enough candy for today, but anyway she quietly finds it and carries it, if you bought a toy, it lasts for 1 day, and doesn’t want to play anymore, I’m not a working mother, I’m raising daughters, I went to work for half a year and quit , getting them to do something, such as modeling or mosaics, is a problem, before the eldest daughter used to study with me with pleasure, was involved in the development of the child, we read a lot, we go for walks every day, the child has no shortage of anything, a bicycle, a scooter, rollerblades, The whole family always walks and relaxes, we live as one family, our grandparents don’t live with us. We can’t go anywhere without children, we have no one to leave with, we take them everywhere with us, that is, the interests of the children are my interests, all for the sake of those I love most.

Hello Maria! what is the punishment system? it turns out that the daughter completely rejects your authority as a mother, as a parent - you see it, you know, she sees it, knows - BUT YOU DO NOTHING! you know that there is a ban on sweets - she has already eaten enough - BUT - she continues to carry them and no one forbids her - i.e. she gets used to the fact that you can always bypass your mother, that you can show your stubbornness, start hysterical and this scares the mother, the daughter sees that you do not see the strength and confidence in yourself to cope with this particular behavior of hers and therefore turn to him and comes running. Punishment is not physical, not scolding - none of this will help. There is a method of logical consequences - when a child realizes that there will be a consequence FOR a certain action - that it is the child who chooses this consequence - and the parent controls how this is carried out. For example, it’s time for lunch and putting away the toys - she doesn’t want to and doesn’t put them away, she continues to play (she knows the weapon against you!) then you offer her two options - either she will put them away and then after eating she can play with them, or you will put them away and then she will NOT see these toys until the next day - what she chooses - naturally, she will not believe you - after all, she has a remedy - screams, tears, hysterics - then YOU show your consistency and do exactly as you were told - she resorts to her weapon - and here IMPORTANT!!! withstand this - let her understand that her tears and hysterics do not scare you and you are not going to give up - then everything depends on your consistency - if YOU are consistent and introduce this system, monitor its implementation, then see how your behavior will change daughter - now SHE is the owner, a little adult, playing it - and when you take your place as a parent and adult, only the place of a child will remain for her! For each situation, you can develop your own consequences - this will help the child realize that she is responsible for her choices, that there are ALWAYS consequences - and you, as a parent, control this!

Maria, if you decide to figure it out, feel free to contact me - call me - I will be glad to help you (you can write to me by email, I can send you the authors of the book and the title, where you can read about it yourself).

Shenderova Elena Sergeevna, psychologist Moscow

Good answer 1 Bad answer 0

Maria, hello!

The cause of behavioral problems in preschool children is always related to family relationships. The nature of the parent-child relationship directly determines whether the child listens to adults or not, whether he follows the established rules, whether he shows aggression towards family members, and many others.

The child, being a priori dependent on adults, adapts to the existing situation in the family. Therefore, the behavior of your eldest (and younger) daughter directly depends on the reactions that follow. And to change your behavior you need to change some of your reactions...

I recommend that you, Maria, do not prolong the problem described and seek in-person help from a psychologist as soon as possible. The fact is that negative behavior is reinforced, and the longer this situation continues, the more difficult it will be to change the behavior of the eldest daughter. Moreover, this will gradually begin to influence the behavior of the youngest...

In addition, it is important to understand that your daughter's disobedience has a negative impact on her development. she gets used to feeling “bad” all the time... And this affects the formation of low self-esteem, a guilt complex and much more... Which will come to light at a much older age! So in a sense, she needs your help! Not only do you suffer from her disobedience, but she too... Even without even realizing it!..

To resolve this situation, Maria, you need to contact a specialist and have the whole family attend an appointment. One joint meeting will be enough for the psychologist to track what in family interaction can lead to the behavioral problems you described. Thus, it will be possible to determine the course necessary to correct the behavior of your eldest daughter and improve your relationship with her!

Personally, I do this kind of work very often through play therapy. So if you want, contact us!

Karamyan Karina Rubenovna, psychologist, psychotherapist, Moscow

Good answer 2 Bad answer 1


, previously the eldest daughter, worked with me with pleasure, was involved in the development of the child,

So what happened?

Sincerely.

Smirnova Alexandra Vladimirovna, psychologist/psychotherapist in Moscow

Good answer 0 Bad answer 2

Tight emotional connection between mother and child begins during the period intrauterine development and persists throughout life.

From birth, parents are the only close people with whom the baby shares his successes and failures.

Parents, in turn, should always understand and help make the right decision.

Sometimes a son or daughter may behave secretly and withdrawn, but this happens when there is no mutual understanding and harmony in relationships between adults and children.

Gradually growing up, each child develops his own views on life, interests, new friends, environment, while the parents do not always like the desire and choice of the child, which leads to misunderstandings and quarrels.

Such a relationship will undoubtedly lead to many problems between very close people.

Why is this happening? And how to maintain and improve your relationship with your child.

Why is the relationship with the child disrupted?

From birth, parents are accustomed to caring for and protecting their child, and are not always ready to accept the fact that their baby is growing up, he has his own ideas, thoughts, desires, and that he has the right to independently solve his problems and make decisions.

Constant control by adults causes irritation and suppression of personality, as a result of which children, especially teenagers, exhibit various kinds of protests with pronounced behavioral disturbances.

There is no need to protect yourself from various difficulties; this will lead to selfishness and unpreparedness for real life.

It should be noted that excessive control from relatives will not lead to anything good. It is necessary to control children, but it must be built on trust and mutual understanding.

How to maintain a good relationship with your child

Forming a close relationship with your child requires early childhood when he begins to adapt to the world around him.

During this period, more than ever, he needs the help of his parents, who must always find time to spend it together. Good relationships in the family will help you remain an authority and example for your child.

There are several tips on how to establish a relationship with your child that will help build good relationship with children and not experience difficulties in raising them.

  • Be sincere, respect his wishes and opinions.
  • Good deeds should be praised.
  • Friendly conversations with a child.
  • Honest and frank in communication. If the baby asks questions that the parents do not want to discuss, you need to try to hold the conversation. It is much better if he gets an honest answer from his parents than from friends or television.
  • Compliance with the rules. Parents should set several rules that their son or daughter should not break. At the same time, he must feel full responsibility for violating these rules.
  • Ability to negotiate. In cases where a child is denied his wishes and begins to be capricious or hysterical, you should find another tempting activity that will help you forget about the previous interest.
  • Children’s personal space: their own room, which must be entered only with a knock, personal belongings.
  • Recourse. He should not feel a sense of fear when turning to his parents.

If he commits bad and thoughtless acts, they should not go unpunished, and there is no need to beat or humiliate him in front of other children.

Physical violence, shows the weakness of an adult, also gives rise to anger and resentment in a child, so it’s better to talk to him, listen and try to understand.

Perhaps he acted badly only because no one had ever explained to him how to behave in such a situation.

A good relationship with a child must be built on mutual understanding, trust and respect.

Any relationship is built on trust, which is easy to lose and extremely difficult to regain.

When a child loses trust in his parents, he will grow up withdrawn, insecure, lonely and resentful.

Such children are completely unadapted to independent life. Therefore, only love, communication and attention will help you grow strong personality who will respect elders and everyone around her.

Try to make every important event in your baby’s life joyful. Celebrate his birthday, performance in kindergarten, school, let him invite his friends and beloved relatives. Go with him to the cinema to watch a popular film or cartoon, take your child to an amusement park, there are various organizations of children's parties with animators and shows for children, they love it.

Having fun in good company, the child will be grateful to you, he will understand that he is important to you and loved. Remember, the strongest relationships with children are built on trust and love.